My friends, everybody has their down days, and during these long winter months it is especially easy to succumb to the doldrums and find yourself in a bit of a funk. But not to fear! I have a simple tip that’s guaranteed to pick you up and get you back in good spirits in no time, and here it is: Whenever you’re…
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The Onion, if you’re reading this, you have to be prepared at a moment’s notice to publish a follow-up to this article, from the same author, which simply says, “I’m finally dead.”
What a cruel world where Mr. Chandler Bong passes in his early 50’s and this insufferable bag of garbage and self-absorption is still with us.