Seagulls are protected under the “Migratory Bird Treaty Act of 1918”. This means that it is illegal to capture, kill, or keep a seagull in your home (unless you have a special permit).
So, no: you cannot go into the Meijer parking lot, yoink a seagull from the flock, and take it home.
This PSA has been brought to you by an argument with my son during a grocery pick-up.
Thank you.
So unfair. Meanwhile, if a flock of seagulls picks you up and flies away with you, there are no legal consequences for them whatsoever.
However, if A Flock of Seagulls picked you up and took off with you, there WOULD be legal consequences.
I understand that this is upsetting, as I know many Michigan residents who have lost loved ones in the Seagull Wars.
However, seagull deterrents are legal, as long as it does not directly harm the birds themselves.
Almost happened to me once, but then I ran. I ran so far away. I just ran, I can all night and day.
It’s not so bad, really. From up here, Aurora borealis comes in view
This is their land, we just moved here
Not entirely true. In bird culture, that is considered a dick move.
Unless the seagulls pick you up in a giant ass peach with the intention of freeing you from an abusive parent.
A human would probably be too heavy for a flock of seagulls to fly away with. They’d be more likely to run so far away with you.
Perhaps too heavy for Herring Gulls, but they could be carried by Great Black-Backed Gulls.
Perhaps if they were to put you on a line between them
I really feel there’s a coconut joke in here somewhere