My professor even gave me an extension too and I was sure I’d finish it with relative quality but my grandma screwed over those plans and now I’m on the day before the due date freaking out since I have yet to actually write about the genocidal actions taken against the Donbas. I sent a lot on my intro going over what definition i was going to use (thee UN) and then did an overview of Euromaidan, every time I sat down to write my stomach would ache and I’d feel physically ill. That’s why I asked for the extension, I thought two extra days would be enough but instead of using that time effectively to talk about the far right and the Donbas (and whether the actions taken are genocidal) Ive been having to cater to my grandmas whims even though I told her I didn’t want to do any work around the house because of school. She clearly doesn’t take my academics seriously as this whole weekend and Monday Ive been bossed around the whole time and have barely been able to do much of anything for my paper passed Euromaidan. My cousin is also visiting which has my dog acting up and that just means everyone is yelling at me even more. This paper is a disaster and I know its not going to be the quality I had hoped it would be. No one ever leaves me alone when I need it an I can’t ask my professor for an extra day, that would be embarrassing. It’s due tomorrow and all I can hope for is he doesn’t fail my ass.

So why am I wasting time writing here? I have to utilize my panic attack somehow. I know a good paper is a finished one but, Jesus Christ, I wish i had more time, I just wish everyone would leave me alone. I know I have to stop caring but it’s hard. I don’t want to do bad but I may just have to take the hit academically and maybe grovel at my professor feet so he’ll go easy on me grade wise.

  • TrudeauCastroson [he/him]@hexbear.net
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    7 months ago

    I definitely second this, the perfect paper will never be written.

    OP, if you have sources planned out, then you have the ability to shit out a first draft, and then edit it when you can.

    Don’t backspace or think about wording too hard, just put it out into the page. It’s easier to rework something than to get it perfect 1st try.

    I did bad in university because of this type of perfectionism, but getting something on paper (or digital, whatever) is super helpful.

    • SpaceDogs@lemmygrad.mlOP
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      7 months ago

      I do have many sources thankfully! And I’m making my way through them. I’ve formatted my paper into specific “slots” being about specific forms of genocidal acts and how situations in the Donbas fit into each. Is it clean and nice? No, but it gets the job done.

      University breeds perfectionism which ends up hurting students but I’m trying to combat this thinking for my own sake.

      • redtea@lemmygrad.ml
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        7 months ago

        Look, you’re in this race now and it’s uphill and you’re tired but you’ve got the whole of Lemmygrad cheering and waiting for you at the finish line, waving red flags. Keep going. You can do it!