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Well fuck… now I’m gonna be sad every time I light my charcoal grill…
Really? I thought it was touching.
It was. But I have several boys off in college that I rarely hear from… just hits a little hard.
Ah. Understandable. My girl is sitting on my leg right now.
And she’s a cat.
But I get it.
“What is my purpose?”
“You help people get cancer by lighting their cigarettes, cigars, and pipes and occasionally arsonists burning down orphanages.”
“Oh my God.”
People who light up candles: 😟
Birthdays don’t exist. That’s a myth made up by Big Cake to get people to buy more cake.
A lot more wholesome than I expected
Jesus fuck that was upsetting