hey. quick disclaimer: this post isn’t for job advices or recommendations, but mostly about dealing with being disabled & unemployed.

sometimes i feel pathetic i can’t find a job. and even more: i’ve never really had a job. volunteering, trading? yes, plenty of times. but the job? like, never. nothing about money, even if freelance. not even mentioning something “official”.

sometimes i even lie to people i have a job. without details or vaguely. or about job i am technically did: art or coding or gamedev for fun or trade. i feel ashamed of being like this. i feel like a burden for my partner i live with.

genuinely, i want to have work. i’m not idealistic about this, nor pessimistic. i’m not going to work in places i can’t hadle at all (social). but i really want to work. like, i already know how commissions work. i have some desires of creating something & being payed for it. or even go to the army (Ukrainian moment).

but i can’t right now. i’m already 24 y.o., and i feel like there is something wrong with me.

is there anybody with the same problems? or maybe, someone who’s dealing with it better than i am? i am open for advice or just listen to your experience.

thanks for reading.