Count Binface, intergalactic space warrior, democracy-lover, and croissant-price-cap crusader.
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It’s a first-past-the-post election - the Tories changed the electoral system because they knew they couldn’t win it in a fair vote. The Tories have also nominated Susan Hall as their candidate - a right-wing extremist, Trump-supporter, culture wars lunatic, swivel-eyed Islamphobic.
In an election like this, if you’re going to vote for a joke candidate then you might as well just vote for the Tory directly.