• SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    2 days ago

    I’m on the fence about that one. I think in queer company, sure. But non-queer people saying that feels … Ignorant and disrespectful.

    I had an argument with a very drunk friend of mine when we were like 20, years ago. He was basically spouting biphobic stuff at me that “it’s all gay”, that “bi? You’re just gay” and stuff like that. It felt really belligerent, homophobic, dismissive, and belittling, all at the same time.

    So umbrellaing under gay, to me, is dangerous, optics-wise.

    • I mean by queer people, and not to call someone gay in the sense that they are sexually and romantically attracted to people of the opposite gender. More in that a particular thing, action, or whatever is gay. I see plenty of other trans people f.ex relating to the term gay in memes regardless of their sexuality. Stuff like that. Of course insisting someone is gay because they are queer would be rude. No one should have a label forced on them

      Biphobia has always been so strange for me, in the same way that breaking the egg prime directive is strange to me (if you are familiar with the term), or erasing asexual people, or ignoring or saying intersex people are an “exception” etc. Let people label themselves.

      • SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        2 days ago

        Oh yeah I get you completely. Honestly, sometimes I refer to “the gays” too. I’m just cautious with it’s usage and when things get technical to use queer, because I think it’s more accurate, encompassing, and less…casual?

        Also, well aware of the egg prime directive. I know a guy who is a minor celebrity and absolutely an egg but refuses to crack that shell at all because it would be a hassle. I have mixed feelings about discussing it with him, I try not to push him, but gods he needs pushing hahaha