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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: July 22nd, 2023

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  • You two are stuck in a feedback loop. It’s a really tough spot to be in until you realize it and work on it.

    Anxiety in a hostile environment (or the perception of being in a hostile environment) will be met with reciprocal hostility. And then things escalate, and then repressed, and it continues. You two are fanning each others flames. You may be more alike than you realize or care to admit.

    Good luck finding a therapist. Remember it’s a lot like dating…you may get lucky on the first meeting, you might find yourself completely incompatible with them, or you may find someone that you’re comfortable enough with to build a good rapport with over multiple sessions.


  • You talked an awful lot about your kid.

    How are you doing?

    Your 18yo sounds like a grown up version of my 4.5 year old. Honestly if you said the arguments were about potty training we’d be talking about the same person.

    How were they, when they started living with you full time, with regards to pottying? Difficult? Regressive? Headstrong?

    I ask because how you are doing, because I started seeing a therapist for my own struggles with parenting. And it’s probably the best thing I’ve ever done. It really gives a chance to reflect and get honest constructive feedback on how I approach and handle interactions and discipline and whatnot. Most importantly, how to deal with stresses of parenting a difficult kid and not criticize yourself too harshly at every setback.

    Please, if you haven’t already, consider a therapist for you, preferably one who specializes in family issues.



  • And they made their father drink wine that night: and the firstborn went in, and lay with her father; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. And it came to pass on the morrow, that the firstborn said unto the younger, Behold, I lay yesternight with my father: let us make him drink wine this night also; and go thou in, and lie with him, that we may preserve seed of our father. And they made their father drink wine that night also: and the younger arose, and lay with him; and he perceived not when she lay down, nor when she arose. Thus were both the daughters of Lot with child by their father.

    Bitches got their dad drunk and raped him till they got pregnant.

    No porn in religion, my hairy ass. I could nut 5 times before I finish reading Genesis. God damn bible practically starts off as a collection of “Dear Penthouse” columns for wealthy literate men who liked wearing colorful gowns.




  • jasondj@ttrpg.networkto196@lemmy.blahaj.zoneRule
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    9 months ago

    This is a beautiful analysis. They can make perfect people, or plants, or whatever, and they know what we would identify as “perfect”…but by being perfect, they can’t be real, and our brains recognize that. So the art has to be intentionally made imperfect. But intentionally making an imperfection that seems real is actually a lot more difficult than it sounds.

    This is like how I feel when I see amazing vocalists intentionally sing way off-key. Like, you can tell they are singing badly on purpose.


  • That’s more or less the right way.

    Use credit cards for everything for an automatic minimum 2% discount on all purchases (in the form of cashback or rewards depending on how you value them, and more if you optimize category spending…I.e. you have a certain card you use for gas or groceries or eating out because that card has the best rewards for that category). Enjoy sign up bonuses if you can responsibly make the spend requirement. Always pay off statement balance and never close accounts (downgrade/product-change to free cards if the benefits aren’t more valuable than the annual fee).

    And enjoy 0% offers but never slip on payment because that’s how they get you. If it’s not paid in full in time or a payment is late they will charge you backdated interest. 0% financing is free money if you can afford it (and can use it) at this inflation rate. I’d been on the fence about replacing my aging appliances but 0% for 24 mos made that a no-brainer. I could afford to have bought those appliances with cash (it’d sting but it’d be doable), but I’d much rather keep that few grand in a CD or bond or mutual fund and pay a 23rd of the balance every month, making me money instead of the bank.






  • jasondj@ttrpg.networktoScience Memes@mander.xyz"Earth-like"
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    10 months ago

    The mean surface temperature of Venus is only 464C.

    But, with 93x the atmospheric pressure of earth, water boils at around 300C.

    So…what is it that makes it difficult to thrive beyond 100C? Is it strictly the temperature, or is it the properties of water at that temperature? If it’s the latter, I wouldn’t be so surprised.

    Also keep in mind that photosynthesis was a genetic accident that just happened to work really, really well, and the ability to process sunlight directly into energy was what allowed microorganisms to move away from thermal vents.

    That same genetic accident could play out in a different world. Or a different genetic accident that’s more suited to their environment. Or no genetic accident at all, and life never moves past small, very secluded regions.




  • The right way to read that chart is “20% of emissions is in making energy for people, 70% of emissions is making energy for literally everything else”. If you consider that my other major personal sources of emissions are driving, domestic heat/hot water, and electricity, that’s saying 1/5 of my personal emissions are just from what it takes to provide my food.

    But meat is damaging for more reasons than emissions. It’s also a major source of excessive water consumption, land use, antibiotic resistance, and pollution of potable water sources (runoff from excrement and chemicals used in the production of food for livestock, which is actually the majority of food grown…which is another reason…it’s just inefficient AF. Our food eats way more food than we do, and almost all necessary micro and (and all macronutrients) are available directly from the plants anyway.

    I’m not saying we all need to be plant based, but the typical American diet is far too focussed on the meat. It’s practically heresy to go a meal without consuming the flesh or excretions of at least one beast. Simply put I think it’s unsustainable to continue consuming meat at this rate, and literally impossible to change the meat industry to grow meat more ethically and sustainably (as in, there isn’t enough arable land in the world to sustainably and “ethically” (in the modern sense of free range/pasture raised-and-finished, limited antibiotic use, etc) grow meat at the rates we are consuming it. I think it’s more immediately achievable to change that attitude and reduce consumption first and foremost.

    Also I do agree that roads should be made of more sustainable materials (though improving mass transit would be an even bigger win, IMO. Make sections of cities car-free (save for emergency services, local deliveries, trash pickup, busses, etc) easily accessible and interlinked by mass transit and park-and-rides from the suburbs. Make most commutes by train/subway faster and easier than driving and people will switch. Bikes and scooters available at every stop. Make employers provide transit and bike/scooter passes. Incentivize employers having hybrid and WFH environments. So much stuff we could be doing, but tearing up or paving over roads that still have useful life left in them shouldn’t be among them.