Only about 1 in 10 LGBTQ adults surveyed said there is "a great deal" or "a fair amount" of social acceptance in the U.S for trans and nonbinary people.
Sadly, in my own experience, the T part of the LGBTQ can only rely on itself. We’re part of a movement, but we’re not the same, we’re allies, our needs and demands are drastically different and most of the LGBs will never ever be able to relate to trans people. It often feel as if we fight with them, but they won’t fight with us. And to be fair, we fight with them in large part because, they’re us, T people are also often LGB as well. The opposite is rarely true.
I want us to be better. To all of my fellow trans people, always keep an eye on what’s happening around you. Protect non-binary people as well, care for Intersex people and work on your anti-racism if you’re not directly concerned by it. We’re tired of being thrown under the bus constantly, let’s make sure we don’t do the same to others. Because there will inevitably come a time where we will be accepted in society and others will be targeted, let’s break this cycle.
Also, sexuality often being defined not just by who you are attracted to but also who you are means that many straight trans people might have thought of themself as gay before they realized they were trans, or others might perceive them as being a gay person, or they themselves might have unresolved feelings about their sexuality still. It can get complicated
I like some of the new terms trying to make sexuality only about who you are attracted to. Makes way more sense imo
Edit: I say this because it came to mind when you said that most of us are LGB, but in many ways we are even more tied up with the LGB than we might first think
The way I see it is that there is only lgbt(qts+etc). It’s all the single banner, with more specific banners underneath, all allied. I refuse to ever use a fragmented name/letters because it doesn’t exist that way and never should. Even seeing it as that way in comments gives me the ick. It’s “the rest of us”, not, “this other thing”. Does that make sense?
I’m on the fence about that one. I think in queer company, sure. But non-queer people saying that feels … Ignorant and disrespectful.
I had an argument with a very drunk friend of mine when we were like 20, years ago. He was basically spouting biphobic stuff at me that “it’s all gay”, that “bi? You’re just gay” and stuff like that. It felt really belligerent, homophobic, dismissive, and belittling, all at the same time.
So umbrellaing under gay, to me, is dangerous, optics-wise.
I mean by queer people, and not to call someone gay in the sense that they are sexually and romantically attracted to people of the opposite gender. More in that a particular thing, action, or whatever is gay. I see plenty of other trans people f.ex relating to the term gay in memes regardless of their sexuality. Stuff like that. Of course insisting someone is gay because they are queer would be rude. No one should have a label forced on them
Biphobia has always been so strange for me, in the same way that breaking the egg prime directive is strange to me (if you are familiar with the term), or erasing asexual people, or ignoring or saying intersex people are an “exception” etc. Let people label themselves.
Oh yeah I get you completely. Honestly, sometimes I refer to “the gays” too. I’m just cautious with it’s usage and when things get technical to use queer, because I think it’s more accurate, encompassing, and less…casual?
Also, well aware of the egg prime directive. I know a guy who is a minor celebrity and absolutely an egg but refuses to crack that shell at all because it would be a hassle. I have mixed feelings about discussing it with him, I try not to push him, but gods he needs pushing hahaha
Sadly, in my own experience, the T part of the LGBTQ can only rely on itself. We’re part of a movement, but we’re not the same, we’re allies, our needs and demands are drastically different and most of the LGBs will never ever be able to relate to trans people. It often feel as if we fight with them, but they won’t fight with us. And to be fair, we fight with them in large part because, they’re us, T people are also often LGB as well. The opposite is rarely true.
I want us to be better. To all of my fellow trans people, always keep an eye on what’s happening around you. Protect non-binary people as well, care for Intersex people and work on your anti-racism if you’re not directly concerned by it. We’re tired of being thrown under the bus constantly, let’s make sure we don’t do the same to others. Because there will inevitably come a time where we will be accepted in society and others will be targeted, let’s break this cycle.
Absolutely! Solidarity is key.
Also, sexuality often being defined not just by who you are attracted to but also who you are means that many straight trans people might have thought of themself as gay before they realized they were trans, or others might perceive them as being a gay person, or they themselves might have unresolved feelings about their sexuality still. It can get complicated
I like some of the new terms trying to make sexuality only about who you are attracted to. Makes way more sense imo
Edit: I say this because it came to mind when you said that most of us are LGB, but in many ways we are even more tied up with the LGB than we might first think
The way I see it is that there is only lgbt(qts+etc). It’s all the single banner, with more specific banners underneath, all allied. I refuse to ever use a fragmented name/letters because it doesn’t exist that way and never should. Even seeing it as that way in comments gives me the ick. It’s “the rest of us”, not, “this other thing”. Does that make sense?
That’s why I like the term queer! And I’ve noticed quite a few people have started using gay as an umbrella term in certain contexts
I’m on the fence about that one. I think in queer company, sure. But non-queer people saying that feels … Ignorant and disrespectful.
I had an argument with a very drunk friend of mine when we were like 20, years ago. He was basically spouting biphobic stuff at me that “it’s all gay”, that “bi? You’re just gay” and stuff like that. It felt really belligerent, homophobic, dismissive, and belittling, all at the same time.
So umbrellaing under gay, to me, is dangerous, optics-wise.
I mean by queer people, and not to call someone gay in the sense that they are sexually and romantically attracted to people of the opposite gender. More in that a particular thing, action, or whatever is gay. I see plenty of other trans people f.ex relating to the term gay in memes regardless of their sexuality. Stuff like that. Of course insisting someone is gay because they are queer would be rude. No one should have a label forced on them
Biphobia has always been so strange for me, in the same way that breaking the egg prime directive is strange to me (if you are familiar with the term), or erasing asexual people, or ignoring or saying intersex people are an “exception” etc. Let people label themselves.
Oh yeah I get you completely. Honestly, sometimes I refer to “the gays” too. I’m just cautious with it’s usage and when things get technical to use queer, because I think it’s more accurate, encompassing, and less…casual?
Also, well aware of the egg prime directive. I know a guy who is a minor celebrity and absolutely an egg but refuses to crack that shell at all because it would be a hassle. I have mixed feelings about discussing it with him, I try not to push him, but gods he needs pushing hahaha