https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hamburger_University
Not to be confused with University of Hamburg.
Hamburger University is a training facility at the McDonald’s Corporation global headquarters in Chicago, Illinois. It instructs high-potential restaurant managers, mid-managers, and owner-operators in restaurant management.[1] Hamburger University’s mission is to become an “organizational culture hub, introducing a continuous education process for the value chain and transforming knowledge into actual business results.”[2] Hamburger University students take courses about restaurant operations, leadership skills, customer service, operations, and procedures. More than 5,000 students attend Hamburger University each year and over 275,000 people have graduated with a degree in “Hamburgerology.” 40% of McDonald’s global leadership has attended Hamburger University.[3]
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I did a research fellowship at Hamburger University in their Endocrinology Lab under Doctor McCheese, the mayor’s son. he is credited with single-handedly getting “Adult onset Diabetes” reclassified as “Type 2” because of how many children have acquired the metabolic disorder before puberty.
we are currently working on a breakfast sausage formulation that will cause violent seizures, but make the person experiencing them think they are receiving instructions from God to buy more food at McDonalds.
it sucks that it’s all proprietary, so I can’t conference or publish, but it is cutting edge behavioral science.
This is just a shitty version of trade schooling, which is already shitty
40% of McDonald’s global leadership has attended Hamburger University.[3]
I wondered if this was just “literally everyone in America and nobody else” but it turns out they got them all over the world:
The program currently has seven campuses worldwide in Oak Brook, Illinois; Tokyo, London, Sydney, Munich, São Paulo, and Shanghai, with an eighth campus scheduled to open in Moscow later this year [2015].
I guess the one in Moscow got shuttered.
Fuck McDonalds and all but on some level I think training the people who run your restaurants to run your restaurants isn’t the worst idea, even societally. I’m not sure it works out like that IRL but it seems to be one way to counter the enshittification of public education by way of alleviating the idea that any bozo that got a business degree should instantly know how to run any business, if you get the idea
Anecdotally, I currently work part time at a Macca’s while I’m studying and my manager mentioned he was trained there. Obligatory recognition that working in fast food always kinda sucks but he is honestly the best boss I’ve ever had.
That said I expect his immediate superior, who gets off on yelling at the kids I work with and is constantly threatening people’s jobs over, just, the pettiest shit (something I am pretty sure is a borderline labour law violation here), also went there. So, y’know.
It is an internal company trade school for middle managers, in some way it is more bearable than people with useless MBAs pretending to know what they are doing.
I got my MD from here.
took me eight long years to get my PhD (potato holding doctorate)
13 for oncology with the residency period at their hospital.
Dr. Leo Spaceman?
I’ve been there
Curry fry shakers are revolutionary technology. Fight me nerds
I’ve been here! Well, to the left of here. It’s a fairly generic McDonald’s aside from the burgerreich’s ivy league uni.
