So, I understand that some people can have the same name, but this isn’t the case with my husband. My husband’s name is so unusually spelled that he was the only person, besides his biological father, who had that first and last name combination on a birth certificate. This is a fact that he shared with me when we first started dating. He seemed pretty proud of that, and I always thought it was funny. After I married him, and changed my last name to his, I became the only woman in America that had my first and last name on record. It’s just that odd of a last name, so please trust me on this one when I say that someone is using his name.

The profile on instagram, that I just discovered, displays a profile picture of an older man, standing, or sitting, beside a woman of about the same age. I wanted to report it to instagram, but there wasn’t an option to report the possibility of a spouse’s stolen identity. It is definitely not my husband’s account. The friends listed in the pages he follows, are not any names that I recognize from his group of friends. He would never lose contact with some of his closest friends.

I am worried.

  • jordanlund@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    I have a similar problem in that some people who legit have my name don’t comprehend that my gmail address is MINE and not theirs.

    I didn’t WANT an Instagram account, I have one NOW because some idiot signed up for it with my address so I changed the password and took it over.

    • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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      2 months ago

      That’s illegal and since it is your email account, you can actually report it to instagram. There is an option to report the person as pretending to be you. Did you report the fraud?

      • voracitude@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        This is not illegal and it does not rise to the level of fraud. It does violates Instagram’s terms of service, but if you want to say it violates laws you’re gonna have to cite your sources.

        • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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          2 months ago

          It would be illegal to log into someone else’s email account without the permission of that person. If someone used another person’s email account to make an instagram in that person’s name, then he or she would need to log into that email account to access the verification link. As soon as he or she logs into the email account, without permission, he or she is breaking the law.

          • voracitude@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            Yes, accessing the email account without authorisation would be prosecutable under the CFAA, but you assume that the Instagram account cannot be used at all without accessing the email account to get the verification code. This is not true. Simply creating the account does not require the verification code, and limited functionality is available if you log in to an unverified account even without completing the verification. Of course the application will hound you to verify your email until you do it, but it’s not immediately necessary.

    • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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      2 months ago

      If anyone has seen him, or sees this post and shows him the wedding photo in my post history, perhaps I can find him. No one else really cares. I have explained this to family, and they don’t care because he physically abused me when we lived together. I realize that, and I don’t want him in my personal life, again. I don’t agree with letting people suffer, though, if he’s homeless somewhere, and can’t reach out for help. Since he’s so popular, I doubt he is. I guess I should just assume his friends are taking care of him, if he is, and that he doesn’t want to communicate with me. I’ll just stay out of it.

        • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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          2 months ago

          That isn’t the name that was on their birth certificate, though, if they are older than him. There are several social media accounts with older men t thing to use his name (men in their 50’s and 60’s). In 2010, my husband told me that he was the only one in America with that name because of how his last name is spelled. I understand that people can change their name through the courts, but I think other men are simply using his identity and have perhaps used it to establish residence, which gives them a public record for living in a given city with that name. In fewer words: I suspect those men of fraud.

          Also, I never said my husband’s name, which I can clearly see displayed in the link that you provided. Did you dox me?

            • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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              2 months ago

              I did show up. They marked me absent and were supposed to change it. I was sitting in the back of the court room and they didn’t see me raise my hand when they called my name. I told the bailiff and he said I would have to have the court change it later, and then reappear. I went down the hallways to that room that has all of the clerks in it, where I could complain. They told me I would have to appeal it, or just start the process all over again. He didn’t appear at all.

              Also, you really aren’t allowed to dox people. You’re breaking the rules of Lemmy on this site.

          • MrMeowMeow@mander.xyz
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            2 months ago

            Not at all, in one of your previous posts you provided a link to a PayPal fundraiser, of which the person who organized it was listed. I just put that name into the website in the url I posted, in the state of California, (from your post history), and it gave my link as a possible spouse. Idk you or your husbands history, I just was replying to hopefully give you some peace of mind that maybe your husband bragging about having a unique name wasn’t true.

  • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    OP, you need to get help with your mental health.

    You keep making these posts showing clear signs of paranoia and delusions.

    Like, how are either you able to looks up your “the only name on record” claims in the first place, just search social media profiles? Is that how you found this guy?

    Now you’re stalking some online person because of a fluke coincidence?

    Like, just a few days ago you had a post saying all these other people were stealing his identity, now it’s online strangers?

    Asking if you should reporting him missing after years?

    It’s just at the point people just need to tell you bluntly:

    Seek mental health help before things get so bad you instinctively reject anything that goes against delusions.

    I know it sucks to hear, and you’re going to think it’s part of a conspiracy, but you need to get professional help.

    • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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      2 months ago

      I didn’t ask for your abusive labeling. Perhaps one day your spouse will have the same experience I am having, and instead of looking for you, people will just insinuate that your spouse is crazy. You could get lost right now, and I wouldn’t even label him or her, regardless of whether or not they searched for you. In fact, you could get lost right now, and I wouldn’t care at all.

      • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        I didn’t ask for your abusive labeling

        It’s the only advice you need, and I started it as plainly as possible because this is the exact response a delusional person would make to the suggestion that they’re delusional.

        Often because it’s not the first time it’s been suggested.

        You make these posts without all the context hoping people reinforce your beliefs if they hear it in small doses.

        Lemmy is too small for that, people recognize usernames.

  • jet@hackertalks.com
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    2 months ago

    If you’re going to make these posts. Don’t delete them. You’re not incentivizing anybody to talk to you when you delete your post when you get a reaction you don’t like.

    • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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      2 months ago

      No. I’m not. The PayPal Fundraiser was for my cat who is still receiving antibiotics for his infection, and will need to have his teeth extracted in less than two months, after the antibiotics are done. Why would I need money to find my husband? He, and his friends in real life, loved using Reddit, and Lemmy. I would be grateful if people on here would take a look at his photo, and mention if they have seen him. Since you seem to like digging through my posts, and keep stalking my account, I figured you might have already seen his photo.

      Also, I blocked you in past posts for some abusive comments. I would appreciate it if you didn’t stalk my account across MULTIPLE areas of Lemmy. It’s weird, not to mention illegal.

      • SatansMaggotyCumFart@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Those are some pretty serious accusations you are throwing my direction with absolutely no proof.

        Have you ever watched Baby Raindeer?

      • Schwim Dandy@lemm.ee
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        2 months ago

        Responding to your posts on Lemmy is not illegal. You have a penchant for non-facts, it seems.

        • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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          2 months ago

          Stalking my account is, in fact, a crime. It goes along with cyber bullying. People have been arrested for it, and even sued for doing so.

          • deegeese@sopuli.xyz
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            2 months ago

            Lady you keep going into the same bar and now you’re threatening the other patrons because they recognize you as a regular.

          • Schwim Dandy@lemm.ee
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            2 months ago

            Replying to you on a social network does not equal cyber bullying no matter how hard you try to paint yourself a victim.

            • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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              2 months ago

              If you’re stalking my account in order to find me, so you can make those comments, then you are committing a crime. It’s not about victim here, it’s about you breaking the law.

              • Schwim Dandy@lemm.ee
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                2 months ago

                You’re a drama queen. You’re not important enough to anyone here for them to stalk you. Why don’t you go back to the fantasy story you posted so we can figure out the one-armed man that has stolen your missing husband’s once-in-a-lifetime last name and who’s most nefarious activity so far is posting to instagram?

      • jet@hackertalks.com
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        2 months ago

        If you actually blocked their account you wouldn’t see their reply at all. It’d be like it didn’t happen. That implies you either didn’t block the account, or you have multiple sock puppet accounts that don’t sync your ban list. And if you have multiple accounts, how is the person you block on one account supposed to know you blocked them?

  • CarbonatedPastaSauce@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Whoever you are, whatever your game or mental health issue is, it would seem people here have tired of your shenanigans.

    You might have more luck back on Reddit.

    • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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      2 months ago

      I’m not pulling any shenanigans. Here is hoping you never have to experience your spouse looking for you. It seems like you want me to shut up and stop looking for my husband. Any reason why? I hope his friends aren’t stalking my account because they did something to him and can’t admit it.

      • jet@hackertalks.com
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        2 months ago

        We’re tired of your posting a new crazy story everyday. Then deleting the post. When the conversation doesn’t support your narrative.

        Also you haven’t had any contact with your husband in 7 years, according to the post you deleted yesterday. How do you know he’s looking for you?

        • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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          2 months ago

          Oh, you speak for everyone? “We’re tired of…”? My posts are crazy? Then stop reading them. If you are ever missing, I will ignore posts about it.

          He probably isn’t looking for me. He probably has found someone new and lives with her. I would like to be officially divorced to severe legal and financial ties. Does that seem crazy to you?

  • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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    2 months ago

    I’m probably being stalked and downvoted by the Dewey’s as they drive around in his car (which my husband still co-owns with me), while they carry his stolen license in their wallet.

    • Dr. Wesker@lemmy.sdf.org
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      2 months ago

      You’ve been posting prolifically, and Lemmy is still a very small ecosystem. I’d venture many of us that sort by All recognize you by now. I doubt you’re being stalked, but rather a handful of people just don’t like your posts.

      I do hope Blue is doing better. Additionally, I hope things getter better for you, as well.

      • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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        2 months ago

        Yeah, shame on me for caring if my estranged husband is still alive. I guess everyone expects me to not care. He is still a human being and doesn’t deserve to be missing without a report, in the event he is in danger.

        • BearOfaTime@lemm.ee
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          2 months ago

          This comment says everying, about you:

          Strawman in the first and second sentence - no one made the statements you’re claiming they’ve made.

          Get down off the cross - no one here is persecuting you, you’re just making that stuff up.

          And don’t try your standard aggressive “you’re being abusive” bullshit with me. You’re using sophistry in every post and comment you make.

          You’re either full of it, or need professional help. I can’t tell which.

          • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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            2 months ago

            “No one is persecuting you…” as you continue to attack me. I bet you’re a real treat to have as a significant other. I’d advise you to get some help before you verbally bash some person in your life outside of Lemmy.

        • Dr. Wesker@lemmy.sdf.org
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          2 months ago

          This is a public forum with a voting system. People choose to use it however they want, for better or worse. As an observation, this just probably isn’t the best venue for such personal posts. It’s also not a place you want to risk doxxing yourself or others, in my opinion.

    • [email protected]@sh.itjust.works
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      2 months ago

      Who’s the Dewey’s?
      Maybe I’m missing something, maybe I’m just dumb, but I don’t khow how anyone can even spot someone’s license or wallet as they drive around.

      Sorry if I’m asking dumb questions, I blame sleep deprivation through work overtime.

      • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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        2 months ago

        It’s the last name of my fifth cousin and his relatives. I didn’t realize I was related to them until today. I just knew the last name as that of the individuals using his ID. Then I remembered one of their first names and took it to Ancestry.com on a whim. Long story short, I just realized that my fifth cousin and his family are the ones who took his ID. He probably thought they were his friends. I didn’t even know to which local family they were connected, until recently. This explains a lot. I hope he is still alive, and not homeless, or dead under a bridge somewhere.

  • Daqu@lemm.ee
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    2 months ago

    There seems to be something big going on in your life. Did you expose a truth that the public should not know, like the true shape of the earth?

    • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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      I think deep down, my family has always had these issues. I’m the baby of the family, and I can remember all the family drama of the early 90’s. It doesn’t surprise me that my distant relatives are pulling some stunt with my husband’s ID. I think they are behind the fake social media account.

  • ashitaka@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    I keep seeing these posts in All and this feels like a really elaborate and well thought out trolling setup with the responses by OP to those commenting.

    Bravo.

    If on the very slime chance otherwise, good luck with everything.

    • ParabolicMotion@lemmy.worldOP
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      2 months ago

      I wouldn’t waste my time on some lie. I spent the past seven years not caring, because I figured my husband set it all up to troll me. Now, I’m sorry I cared. I shouldn’t have even mentioned it. Let the cops find him, or not. It’s not my problem anymore. If someone tries to come after me for some problems he has caused while we were apart, I’ll just refuse to help. Who cares? It’s not like my husband is family to me.

      • ashitaka@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        It’s the curse of being human and having a conscience, I’m afraid. Mind vs. heart and all that.